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Way To Go NBC - Protect What's Yours

Let me start this post off by adding this disclaimer. I have no sympathy nor do I in any way support NBC Universal. In fact I don't really hold them very highly at all following their treatment of one Conan O'Brien. However, the last few weeks I've seen the internet up in arms because NBC and Sony put a stop to some fans (one of them an actor in NBC's employment) who tried to take NBC property and create a web series based on it.
The property in question is the show within a show "Inspector Spacetime" which appeared as a "Dr. Who" parody on the show "Community."  The actor who played the character on the show decided he would pitch to NBC to spin off a web series. When he didn't get the answer he wanted, he turned to the internet, and that's what really got things going.
You see, "Inspector Spacetime" is the intellectual property of NBC and Sony. End of discussion. They can do with it as they will. If they want to shelve it, and never let it see the light of day again, it's their call. They and their staff of brilliant writers created it, so why should they let someone else take their creation and use as they will. This is stealing.
It seems now we live in a world were, thanks to YouTube, Vimeo and so on, any jack hole with a camera thinks he's a filmmaker. A task that once upon a time was reserved for the talented... And maybe a few not so talented, but opportunistic and lucky individuals. On top of this, you have a portion of this group, who don't really have any ideas of their own, and lack the talent and skill to develop something. So they create what is essentially fan fiction based on their favorite shows and movies. Then, they try to justify this by calling it a parody. The thing is fan fiction is not a parody. A parody is defined as "comic imitation of a literary or musical work." There is usually nothing comical about fan fiction, in fact, to make fun of the source would most likely go against the very fabric of what they are trying to do in the first place. Nope bottom line, it's plagiarism and copyright infringement.
Now don't get me wrong, not all web content falls under this seedy cloud. In fact there is a whole community of content creators doing it the right way, and also creating quality content. I myself am the co-creator and head writer for the web series "Short Term." So for me, what is happening with NBC would be like Short Term actors Raj Kalra or Emily Button trying to take their character and create their own spin off series (not that they would). Those characters are not those actors' creative property, and you bet your sweet ass I would do all I could to protect what I created and hold dear, just like I would expect anyone reading this article to do for their own content. 
So before you judge NBC to harshly take a look at it from their perspective. Then maybe you'll see that what was really going on was actually pretty shady. Just remember, if this were easy anyone could do it... And obviously "anyone" can't.

P.S. yes I understand that "Inspector Spacetime" is a parody of "Dr. Who," but it does not break any laws as it does in fact follow the rules of what defines something as a parody. Furthermore, one would assume that NBC had the permission of the BBC in the first place.

The JLP's Weekly Update

Ex-ESPN writer Anthony Federico released an apology on Monday calling a racial slur he made against New York Knicks guard Jeremy Lin, "an honest mistake." Federico went on to say, “That’s the last time I ask Brett Ratner for help writing an article."

In Tennessee, a bill dubbed the "Don't Say Gay Bill," passed the state  legislature's education subcommittee last week, which would prohibit the open use of the word "Gay" in all Tennessee public schools. Many in the state are worried that if the bill passes, their kids won't know what to call marching band members anymore.

Recent Grammy winner Kevin Mackie has returned to his job at a Pennsylvania supermarket just a week after his big win. It just goes to show you, Grammys come and go, but a 2 for 1 sale on Grand’s Biscuits won't re-stock itself.

The Republican primary race heats up again this week in Arizona highlighted by yet another CNN debate. Though political experts aren't ready to predict a winner, the loser will, once again, be anyone who watches.

A dock worker was killed in Portland Oregon, this weekend, by falling into a vat of deadly toxic chemicals. In other news, a study in Portland Oregon has proven that falling into a vat of toxic chemicals will not make you a real life super hero.

And finally, a Florida woman is asking for help locating a gun that she lost at a Tallahassee shopping mall Sunday. The woman says she only carries the gun with her for protection, just in case "shit goes down" at the Wetzel's Pretzels.

*The JLP’s Daily News is comedy satire, and should not be taken seriously. No animals were hurt during the writing of this article.

New Beginnings - Short Term Season 2 Premier

C'mon Hostess

Geez Hostess... All this man wanted was a Twinkie. Don't take that from him. Rule #32: Enjoy the little things 

JLP Does Conan Jokes

Back in December I did a show at iO West in Hollywood for a packet I put together for the TBS talk show "Conan" (hosted by Conan O'Brien). It was my first time on stage and I was very thankful for those who got a chance to come out and support me and see the show, which included my Conan bit, and two sitcom script readings. Other than the fact no one brought drinks, it thought it was a great night. Anyway, I've decided to share my monologue jokes here on my blog, and I would love feedback on them. If I get a big enough response, I  will try to post more each week. We'll see. For now enjoy these jokes from the week of November 14th thru the 20th. (the week before Thanksgiving)

Did you guys see that the new Twilight movie, "Breaking Dawn," made $140 million in it's opening weekend. $140 million. This got me to thinking maybe, in our current economy, the government should think about a imposing a vampire and glitter tax.


Speaking of the economy, this Friday is Black Friday, and my mom is already making her plans for 12 hours of shopping, spending hundreds of dollars on stuff that no one in my family really wants. Or as my dad likes to call it, "a small price to pay for a little peace and quiet around here."


Anybody here on Facebook? That may be the dumbest question I ever ask. Anyway, Facebook this week found itself the target of internet spammers who were posting pornography on it's users wall feeds. A spoke person for Facebook says they're working to fix the issue and that most of the porn is gone, but in the mean time they were encouraging users to try out their new "Really Like" button.


The US Immigration Services Office says that many illegal immigrants are returning to Mexico due to the poor US job market. Shortly after, the White House released a statement saying, "Hey, we may not have fixed the economy, but it looks like we found a solution the immigration problem."


The economy in Greece has gotten so bad they've basically had to start over with a brand new government. A spokes person for the outgoing administration stated that they just didn't understand how an economy based solely on the export of humus and yogurt could fall apart so fast.


You guys see that Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore are getting divorced? Sources close to the couple said that the split is due to the non-stop fighting. Yeah, the source goes on to say, she was tired of  Ashton staying out late hanging with his friends, and he was tired of watching re-runs of "Murder She Wrote." You see, because she's older... whatever, you'll get it on the way home.


Finally, This past Friday marked the end of an era as Regis Philbin said goodbye to his long running TV show. When asked how she felt about her former co-hosts retirement, Kathy Lee Gifford responded, " I haven't felt anything for the last fifteen years."

Thanks so much, and please leave any feedback you have below, good or bad.

JLP

Merry Christmas

Somewhere along the way Christmas became more about spectacle and one-ups-man-ship than being about celebrating the best we, as humans, have to offer. Case in point, pepper spraying people at Walmart for some bullshit "gift" that will end up in the trash or simply forgotten about in 6 months anyway. I wonder what Jesus would say about the commercialization of his birthday. I wonder how he would feel about taking something so holy and sacred and turning it into a day of greed and gluttony. I don't think this is what he would have had in mind at all.

The best Christmas I've ever had was a year that an ice storm cause the power to be out for 4 days. Every one of my gifts was electronic, but I didn't care. It was Christmas at its purest form, and it was really nice. Now days it's all about the latest igadget or whatever else "the man" tells us we need. I can't help but laugh every time I see one of those ridiculous Lexus commercials on TV. Really, who the fuck can afford to give a Lexus? I guess if you can, you're not reading this article. The problem is, as a society, we see that and now we think that's what we must do.

Maybe for once, we can all just be happy with what we have. Be happy that there are people that care about us. Maybe instead of fighting over an Xbox on Black Friday, we should buy a gift or two for Toys for Tots. Maybe take a weekend and volunteer at a homeless shelter. Or, at the very least, pray for each other, and just enjoy what the holidays bring. I haven't been home for Christmas in two years, yet I don't complain, it is what it is...

Enough ranting, it's Christmas after all... In closing (and not that my words will make much of a difference) this year, stop for a moment and remember that Christmas is a time to celebrate peace and love. It's a time when we, as human being, can live up to our potential, even if it's only for a short time. Remember that it's about celebrating the birth of a man who gave up everything for all of us, and never expected anything in return. A man who didn't were a red coat and have a white beard, or pants. A man who would never shop on Black Friday and doesn't care how old your phone is... In short... a man who loves all of us, despite our many faults and forgives us for bastardizing his name every chance we get. 

Merry Christmas and God be with you all this holiday season.

Batmobiles

I have now seen and photographed every Batmobile from TV to the movies. Take a look.

CAP'N CRUNCH VS SOGGIES - THE EPIC 1986 BATTLE

Remember way back in 1986 when the Soggies kidnapped the Cap'n and we had to call in to the hot line for the clues in order to figure out which door he was behind... only then could he escape. Those were trying times for the Cap'n.

CAP'N CRUNCH VS. SOGGIES: VIDEO 2

THOSE DAMN SOGGIES!

CAP'N CRUNCH VS SOGGIES VIDEO 1

YOU GET 'EM CAP'N!

CELEBATRATE NATIONAL CAP'N CRUNCH VS. SOGGIES DAY

It seems like every day I wake up, look at Facebook or Twitter only to see that I must celebrate some really trivial thing today. Things like, National Talk Like A Pirate Day (Sept 19th), or National Chicken Wing Day (July 29th). The list goes on and on. So I ask, since it appears anyone can declare any day a holiday or day of celebration for any cause or item of their choosing. Why can't I declare a day of celebration to remember those who came before us; fighting for truth, justice, and crunchy cereal?

That's right, I hereby declare today, October 12th, National Cap'n Crunch Vs Soggies Day. After all, it was Captain Horatio Magellan Crunch how has devoted his entire life to fighting the evil Soggies, a mysterious race of evil milk people who set out to "sog up" his cereal in the 1980's. If not for our valiant, albeit Spanish Captain, our morning cereal might actually soften in milk, as opposed to cutting up the roof of our mouths.

So, here's to you Cap'n… May you go down in history with other greats of your rank, like: Captains Kirk, Picard, Kangaroo, and Planet. We honor you, with this day of days.

Diva Actress - Fad Diets

Thursday Night At The Improv

Great night of comedy at the Improv last night. Highlights included the cast of NBC's Free Agents and a musical number between Jeff Ross and John Legend.

A Letter To Hugh Jackman

Dear Hugh Jackman,
I see we still are at this impasse... I want you to follow me on Twitter, and you still haven't followed me on Twitter. I'm not sure what more I have to do. It's not like I'm gonna go single white female on you... right away. I mean, I understand you are a very important man, singing and dancing and clawing your way through life, but Hugh, what's a man without friends. Friends who will let you star in their web series musical and not even make you audition. Trust me, I wouldn't do that for anyone, just ask Patrick Duffy. No Hugh, when I look at you I see a guy who's got his shit together, a guy I could have a drink with, a guy my girlfriend would push me off a cliff for, but most importantly I see a guy who needs to follow me on Twitter. Just think about how much fun we could have.... and no, you can't meet my girlfriend. Till next time, your pal,

JLP

My Review of Moneyball

So, from the title I suppose you've guessed that I saw "Money Ball" last week. Let me start this post by saying that I don't normally write reviews, and I tend to be very opinionated about films, so my commentary can be a little strong at times. For this post, however, I will try to keep it as light as possible, in my attempt to tell you about a very solid film.

For those who don't know, Money Ball is a movie based on a book (Moneyball: The Art of Winning an Unfair Game), which chronicles Oakland A's GM Billy Beane as he tries to rebuild a professional baseball team with a budget that is probably actually less than what it cost to produce and promote the movie. It's all based on real events, real players... you get the picture. Anyway, at the surface, it's a movie about the economics of pro baseball, and even I was afraid going in that it would be a snoozer. Not so much, it seems, somebody, somewhere remembered at the end of the day, this is a sports movie, and therefore should also be fun and enjoyable. Now for those who read the book, the movie isn't as much about statistics and scouting, though these are the very root of the entire film. Instead the movie focuses primarily on Beane and the A's following their 2001 dismantling due to the fact that they only had an operating budget of $41 million (compared to the Yankee's $125 million). Much like the characters in the film, Money Ball is not a traditional sports film, it's not as much about the baseball on the field (though there is enough of that to keep the purists happy) but more about what goes on behind the scenes, in scouting meetings, locker rooms and front offices.

Of course at its root, Money Ball is a love story. It's a story about a man who is torn between two loves; the love of his daughter and the love of a game that has been his entire life. Don't get me wrong, the stuff about OBP and walks combined with runs per 9 innings and how that equates to wins is very interesting. I think the performances of Philip Seymour Hoffman as Art Howe and Jonah Hill as the fictional Peter Brand give solid performances, as do Chris Pratt and Stephen Bishop. However, it's the "love story" that seals the deal here. Whether the father/daughter relationship is a Hollywood fabrication, or if it's 100% truthful, I have no idea, but the scenes between Pitt and Kerris Dorsey, who plays Beane's daughter Casey, are solid, touching and serve to ground the story in reality.

The subtle beauty of Moneyball

Of course, when you get right to it, this is a baseball movie, and it's Pitt's depiction of Beane's love of the game that really allows this movie to succeed. In some of the best scenes in the movie, Pitt says nothing; he merely walks the stands of the Oakland Coliseum, strolls through the empty locker room, or simply lies in the outfield grass. Anyone who has ever played a sport, or loved a game so much, it's these little things that get taken for granted. I know ever fall, I sometimes catch the smell of fresh cut grass on a cool day and my mind suddenly has a football flash back. Yes, it's this collection of subtle visuals that lift this movie from pedestrian to very good.

I say, if you enjoy a good movie, and want to see something entertaining that should not get an Oscar nod, but probably will because of the people attached; then check this one out. However, if you are a baseball fan, or just a sports fan in general, this is a must see, the story, the performances, the tone of the subject matter combine making this the most earnest sports movie since "Bull Durham," and that's saying something.

JLP

Diva Actress - Type Cast

Diva Actress - The Process

A Knight at Medieval Times

The Best Of Friends

They say dogs are a man's best friend, and that's no lie. There are very few animals in this world as loyal as a dog. In fact, dogs are probably more loyal than most people. So it's with a heavy and sad heart that today I have to say goodbye to a dear friend. No, he's not my dog, he never was my responsibility, and sure we never saw eye to eye on everything, but what friend does, right? But Swoosh was no ordinary friend or dog, for that matter.

I think humans can learn a lot from dogs, I know I have. I've learned that sometimes, you’ve just got to take a nap, and it's OK to lick my balls in public, and if poop in the grass, most likely somebody's gonna clean it up. Not that those aren't all great things, but the most important thing I've learned is that sometimes in life, there are more important things than yourself, sometimes it's best to make other people happy, and in turn, you'll be better for it. That's what Swoosh did. I saw it many a time, as Swoosh would selflessly curl up next to someone and let them scratch his head or rub his neck. Oh sure, he's a dog, he loves to get petted, but he knew that one of life's greatest joys, is to pet a puppy dog.

If you had a chance to know him, you know exactly what I'm talking about, and you know there was no better feeling than when he purred like a cat when you would pet him. I bet, if you ever spent any time with him, what so ever, you probably walked away feeling a little better, a little happier. That's what dogs do, and that's what Swoosh did, more so than any other. Now the time has come to tell him goodbye. True, it's a sad day when you have to say goodbye, but it's also a joyous thing to celebrate the life of someone, or something so warm and caring. Some will say he's just a dog, and I will counter with, "there's no such thing." Have you ever owned a dog, have you ever looked into their eyes?” They aren't cat's, there's a soul in there, and any person looking can see that. That's why they are man's best friend, because if you love them, they will love you back, whole heartedly and without prejudice.

I never knew a more loving person or animal in my life, and I've never seen one loved more in return. I feel honored that I got to know him and love him, and even though he wasn't my dog, he will always be my friend.

JLP