Merry Christmas

Somewhere along the way Christmas became more about spectacle and one-ups-man-ship than being about celebrating the best we, as humans, have to offer. Case in point, pepper spraying people at Walmart for some bullshit "gift" that will end up in the trash or simply forgotten about in 6 months anyway. I wonder what Jesus would say about the commercialization of his birthday. I wonder how he would feel about taking something so holy and sacred and turning it into a day of greed and gluttony. I don't think this is what he would have had in mind at all.

The best Christmas I've ever had was a year that an ice storm cause the power to be out for 4 days. Every one of my gifts was electronic, but I didn't care. It was Christmas at its purest form, and it was really nice. Now days it's all about the latest igadget or whatever else "the man" tells us we need. I can't help but laugh every time I see one of those ridiculous Lexus commercials on TV. Really, who the fuck can afford to give a Lexus? I guess if you can, you're not reading this article. The problem is, as a society, we see that and now we think that's what we must do.

Maybe for once, we can all just be happy with what we have. Be happy that there are people that care about us. Maybe instead of fighting over an Xbox on Black Friday, we should buy a gift or two for Toys for Tots. Maybe take a weekend and volunteer at a homeless shelter. Or, at the very least, pray for each other, and just enjoy what the holidays bring. I haven't been home for Christmas in two years, yet I don't complain, it is what it is...

Enough ranting, it's Christmas after all... In closing (and not that my words will make much of a difference) this year, stop for a moment and remember that Christmas is a time to celebrate peace and love. It's a time when we, as human being, can live up to our potential, even if it's only for a short time. Remember that it's about celebrating the birth of a man who gave up everything for all of us, and never expected anything in return. A man who didn't were a red coat and have a white beard, or pants. A man who would never shop on Black Friday and doesn't care how old your phone is... In short... a man who loves all of us, despite our many faults and forgives us for bastardizing his name every chance we get. 

Merry Christmas and God be with you all this holiday season.

CAP'N CRUNCH VS SOGGIES - THE EPIC 1986 BATTLE

Remember way back in 1986 when the Soggies kidnapped the Cap'n and we had to call in to the hot line for the clues in order to figure out which door he was behind... only then could he escape. Those were trying times for the Cap'n.

CAP'N CRUNCH VS. SOGGIES: VIDEO 2

THOSE DAMN SOGGIES!

CAP'N CRUNCH VS SOGGIES VIDEO 1

YOU GET 'EM CAP'N!

CELEBATRATE NATIONAL CAP'N CRUNCH VS. SOGGIES DAY

It seems like every day I wake up, look at Facebook or Twitter only to see that I must celebrate some really trivial thing today. Things like, National Talk Like A Pirate Day (Sept 19th), or National Chicken Wing Day (July 29th). The list goes on and on. So I ask, since it appears anyone can declare any day a holiday or day of celebration for any cause or item of their choosing. Why can't I declare a day of celebration to remember those who came before us; fighting for truth, justice, and crunchy cereal?

That's right, I hereby declare today, October 12th, National Cap'n Crunch Vs Soggies Day. After all, it was Captain Horatio Magellan Crunch how has devoted his entire life to fighting the evil Soggies, a mysterious race of evil milk people who set out to "sog up" his cereal in the 1980's. If not for our valiant, albeit Spanish Captain, our morning cereal might actually soften in milk, as opposed to cutting up the roof of our mouths.

So, here's to you Cap'n… May you go down in history with other greats of your rank, like: Captains Kirk, Picard, Kangaroo, and Planet. We honor you, with this day of days.

Thoughts from LAX

Nothing says Christmas like standing in line at the airport, and nothing says airport like standing in line surrounded by the aroma of bad breath and body peer. Seriously people, just because you're on an early flight doesn't mean there's no reason to take a shower, or take a mint. I have mints, I'll give you one.


So since I've been here, I've made an observation about our airport security. First, for you travelers out there, shoes go on the belt this holiday season, not in the tray. Second, why put ropes up if your just gonna let everyone go under them. If you are wearing any sort of camouflage, you go to the front of the line, military or not. I just watched as a Middle Eastern looking gentleman was searched and wanded for about 20 minutes. He looked pissed and I don't blame him, he didn't even get a cigarette after.

For all you travelers out there be prepared this holiday season and arrive early for your flight. I got to LAX at 5 am so there were only 2000 people in the southwest terminal rather than the 5000 that are normally here.

Oh well, that's all for now. Happy Holidays everyone, and good luck out there.

JLP