You Can't Give Yourself A Nickname...

No, you probably aren't.

If I could describe myself, I would use words like funny, charming, intellectual, and creative. Never once would you see the words, procrastinate, stubborn, impulsive, or impatient, the words I figure most people use to describe me. You see for me, "describing" yourself is about as vain and douchey as giving yourself a nickname. I have had several nicknames in my life, some I like(d) some I hopefully will never hear uttered to me again. They were all given to my by other people though, never of my own device.

Living in Hollywood, and having to be around people that are constantly selling themselves, trying be a 'brand," I guess I should be used to all of this now, but for some reason I'm not. It's something I find I must do myself sometimes. Though I'm always careful to never cross that line, and trust me, it's a fine line. So, I have created a guide to let you know if you are crossing the line, and stepping into the world of being a sell out or just an outright douche.

• If  you you describe your sense of humor as (insert adjective here), but people just don't get it... Most likely you've chosen poorly. Just because you think you're quirky, or adorable or whatever doesn't mean you are, it just means you want to be. In reality, you could be mean, insensitive, or just plain unfunny and never really know it. Hell, it took me a very long time to learn that my sense of humor is very dry, at least I'm told.
• Anytime you give yourself a nickname.
• If you go out of your way to call yourself a geek or nerd, you're probably not. I know nerd is cool now, but just because you have an iPhone and like Star Wars, doesn't mean your a nerd. Actually, if you were a nerd, you would have a hacked android phone and know why the Millennium Falcon is so much faster than any other ship in light speed (186,000 miles per second) even though they are all going the same speed.Or you might know the best type of crystal to focus a light saber. (correct answer: Kaiburr crystal).



A real geek owns this rare 1977 Star Wars t-shirt, but never wears it.

• If you describe yourself as a "Brand," or in the third person.
• You are either a leader of people or you are not. That's just the way it is. You can't learn to lead, you can't be taught to inspire. Just because you are in charge, doesn't mean people will follow you.

Expect this list to grow with future posts, as this is just the tip of a much bigger issue. In fact feel free to comment with your own if you've got them.  As for today's lesson... Bottom line, be yourself, and if you're funny, you'll be funny, if you're a leader, you'll lead, and if geek, you'll buy all seven versions of the Blu-ray Star Wars box sets that will be coming out in the next three years. 

P.S. this post is not about any one actual person, it's a collection of thoughts I've collected observing many people. So if you get offended by something in this post, I promise, it was not directed at you... though it could mean you probably are a douche.

Kick- Ass and the movies of 2010

I saw Kick-Ass yesterday afternoon, and let me tell you, the critics were right. This movie isn't fit for kids. There is some very bad language spoken by a little 11 year old girl. Also, she manages to kill a shit load of people. This movie isn't for kids, and it's awesome. Somehow, parents think a movie that stars kids, or anything based on a comic book is kid friendly. Parents, you're stupid. This is an action movie, one the best I've seen in some time. What happens when re-cast 'Die Hard" with a little girl, you get Kick-Ass. If you love you're action flicks, go see this movie, and see in the theater, it's meant to be shared with a crowd.

This brings me to my next topic today. A good friend of mine told me today that he no longer intends to see movies in theaters because he is tired of spending that much money on a ticket when movies turn out to suck. While I will agree with him on the fact that there seems to be a lot of crap dumped on us by studios, to swear off movies all together, well, that's a little hard to swallow from a man who is a filmmaker. That would be like a musician who didn't like concerts. I guess my thing here is, and this goes not only for him but also for anyone else who enjoys cinema.

Not every movie is meant to be seen in the theater. In fact, I would say that most aren't really worth what you have to pay these days. There are, however, that I feel, must be seen in the theater with a crowd. I'm not old enough to have seen the original Star Wars trilogy when it came out, but I did see the re-release of the special editions, and it was the first true movie event I ever got to experience. Then, of course, came Episodes I, II, and III, and though they, in no way lived up to the hype, I can't imagine not seeing them in the theater with that crowd. Sometimes, even a bad movie must be seen with a crowd. Like Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. (Sorry George Lucas) That Movie was shit, pure shit, but seeing it with that crowd, those folks who like me, wanted to see Dr. Jones in another adventure. We all took that ride together, and you know what, I'm glad I did. Granted I don't acknowledge that movie's existence and will never watch it again.

Now, net ever movie is worth your bucks, and even some that you think maybe, will only let you down. So what qualifies a movie worth it? That's up to you and your tastes, but I have compiled a list of this summer's movies that you have to see, because either they are going to rock your socks off, or they will be colossal failures, either way, it should be fun and seen on the big screen. Anything else is just a gamble.

The Losers - April 23
Iron Man 2 - May 7
Shrek Forever - May 21
The A-Team - June 11
Toy Story 3 - June 18
Inception - July 16
The Other Guys - August 6
The Expendables - August 13
Machete - September 3
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I - November 19
True Grit - December 25